Monday, March 19, 2007

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THE LOST POST





PHOTOGRAPHED 3/07


Last night I was unfortunate to type a long blog post only to have it vanish into the cyber dumpster. I was unable to recover it so now all entries will be done on word first then copied to Blogger. I’m not a good or fast typist so losing a lengthy blog is somewhat disheartening. I know I will not remember all that I wrote as it was a free-flowing jumble of thoughts but here it goes….

Some questions were asked about my dialysis and diet – here are the answers,

I am on hem dialysis now, I had used both CCPD & CAPD for a year before an infection render my body unable to filter well enough to keep using it. I go to a dialysis center three days a week. Each treatment runs for 4 hours each plus the time to hook up and disconnect. (about 15 minutes each way)

My diet is somewhat restricted in that it’s both a diabetic and renal. The renal part is by far the worst of the two diets. Anything that might be considered good to eat is restricted.

In this diet you need to avoid all dairy products. That means – Milk, cheese, ice cream, puddings, whole grain foods, nuts, chocolate even beans like in chili and baked beans are out.

Fluid intake is severely restricted. It is the equal vent of 4 – 12oz cans of drink a day. That includes the water used to make the Jell-O and soup you might consume. Even the water content of a large salad must be considered.
It could be worse so I guess I shouldn’t gripe about it. The other day I had one of my favorite foods – homemade macaroni and cheese – for the first time in two years. Ahhh… It was sooo good and later I was sooo sick. It seems that going without or very little dairy products you lose the ability to digest them. Yogurt will help you regain this micro flora BUT, IT YOO IS A FOOD TO AVOID!
You know I don’t fear death itself. It might even be a relief for me and everyone else who’s involved with me. What I do fear is being without Sue. I don’t want to leave her. Right before this happened our life was really good. Sure we are far from rich money-wise. There are lots of things we want, a few we need but all in all we’re happy – THAT’S WHAT I DON’T I WANT TO LEAVE BEHIND.

Well, this one got longer than I intended too. Thanks for listening to my meandering thoughts tonight.

-Mark
PS – Photo for today The covered bridge at Stone Mountain Park in B&W

3 Comments:

At 11:13 PM, Blogger Pat said...

Awww, Mark...

{{{{{BIG GIANT HUGS TO YOU AND SUE}}}}}

Oh, how I know what you're speaking of. Jack said those words often but he didn't want to leave me. And I didn't want him to leave me either Mark and I'm sure that Sue feels exactly the same way. You must realize that.

Regarding the food, yes it's so difficult. There was a saying down at the unit, "If it's good for you, it's not good for you!!" and you'll understand that.

You know what Jack used to have instead of porridge in the morning? He had cooked grits! We don't have grits up here like you do but a friend sent some up from a mill in Georgia and we kept them in the freezer and each morning he'd cook some grits and have milk on them and pretend they were his beloved rolled oats porridge.

I love your photo. I'll have to post one of the only old covered bridge left here in Ontario. We have a relatively new one that was built here in Guelph in the 1990's and it's a lovely pedestrian bridge across one of our rivers.

Here it is. Now I'll have to look up one of the oldest one. It's about 10 miles from here so a nice ride when all the snow is gone.

Keep hanging in there, Mark.

{{{{MORE HUGS?}}}}}

 
At 2:33 PM, Blogger talj said...

Lovely image Mark, very nicely done. So glad that Pat is here and that she pointed me to your blog. Thinking of you and Sue {{{HUGS}}}

 
At 7:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny how when we first think it's the end in sight, I seems so doable. As the time passes we tend to get more involved with the life we were ready to walk away from so easily at first.

Leaving the people you love to a future we can't even imagine is a thought I think everyone who gets a serious look at their mortality considers.

You make all the plans you can for them. Do all you can to make the transition easier, then bam something comes along they really need you for and you can't let go. Then it is god let me stay around long enough to help her through this. Then you prepare yourself again and it doesn't happen and something else comes along.

The truth probably is you can prepare for the end all you want, but you are never prepared to just lay down and let it happen. Well most of us anyway.

So keep on finding reasons not to give up, we need you in this world. CG

 

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